We Got Mail

This weekend I was doing my routine email check and there was a message from someone who saw our profile from Adoption Connection!We've only been in outreach for a week and already someone wants to place their kid with us? We decided to turn it down because we weren't sure if we could handle this particular situation. The child is 2 years old, and has various health issues. David and I had to do a lot of serious soul searching because how can you say 'no' to anyone? We are going to refer her to the people at Adoption Connection and maybe they can help her out.

Project Funway

I know this will be divisive, but I secretly think Christian from Project Runway is funny... There, I said it.Happy Valentines Day!

Up and Away

I know I just posted yesterday but we got some exciting news. We are now officially in Outreach! Adoption Connection has put our profile up on their website. You can check it out here if you are so inclined. Now it's just a matter of twiddling our thumbs until we get the fateful call that will change our lives forever.

More Than Words

Hi everyone! How are things? Thought I'd try a greeting this time since communication is the key to any successful relationship. We learned that and much more last night at our "Preparing for Adoption" workshop. The guest speaker was an adult adoptee who told us her story. She talked about growing up as an adopted person who didn't know her birth parents (closed adoptions were the norm back then) and her journey to find her birth mom. Very very eye opening! I think I was ready to hear the childhood parts of her story since that's in the relative immediate future for us. The thing that caught me unawares was the description of her relationship with her birth mom as an adult. I guess it never dawned on me that adopted kids grow up one day and have lives of their own. Oh how young and naive I was back then (yesterday).Baby's might be cute and cuddly but let's see how cute it is when they're 40 and introducing their own kids to the birth mother. What is that relationship? I suppose it's a relationship that has no label and just is what it is. It will be up to our son or daughter to decide how to handle it and our job as parents to help it navigate through those times as best we can. You can't spell REASSURING without SURI and we all know her future is taken care of.

Meconium, YOUconium

That's the name of the baby's first poop. It's dark and sticky. Who knew!? Did you also know you can press below the belly button to 'pop' the umbilical cord stump up like a scabby turkey thermometer? Well, we learned all this and a whole mess of other information last weekend at our 'Infant Care' seminar. 5 hours of do's and don'ts that left us in a daze.Our teacher went over all the basics of taking a newborn home and dealing with its needs for the first few weeks of life. If anyone is thinking of having a baby, or is about to have one, I highly recommend taking a class like this. She showed us a video that had things you'd never want to see, but will soon be a reality in your life with baby on the way. She taught us things ranging from what kind of detergent to use, to interview questions when picking a pediatrician, to techniques for picking up a newborn.I wouldn't say I feel at ease now, but it definitely alleviated some of my worries. At least we now know what kind of pillow to put in Count Suckula's crib (answer: none).

Letter Rip!

We finished our Birthmother letter last night! After revising the wording and layout a couple times, we're finally finished. Tonight I'm going to go print off a billion copies and then scatter them across this fair nation of ours. Here is what the cover looks like:

Roller Coaster

*Sweet Baby Cheeses, I'm sorry if anyone clicked on the "horrible parents" link before 3pm today. I uploaded a picture the way I normally do it, but I think the link was corrupted and/or hijacked. Anyway, it's fixed now. Back to scheduled programing.*
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We are in the midst of a 5 week "Preparing For Domestic Adoption" workshop. There have been two sessions so far and boy is it ever a roller coaster. I went from excitement talking with other adopters, to insecurity thinking we are going to be horrible parents, to questioning how much I even want to do this, back all the way around to seeing the light at the end of the tunnel and thinking it is all going to be worth it.The first session we just got to know everyone and talked about what brought people to choose adoption to start their family. It made for a very serious time since most of the people are there because of some kind of infertility or loss. Not all of us though... The interesting thing about our group is that out of 9 couples, 4 of them are gay men. Looks like we chose the right agency!All of us are at different stages of the process so it was great to hear stories about how people's experiences have been while also being glad that some parts are already over for us. Most everyone had an easy time with the homestudy and are struggling writing their "Dear Birthmother Letter". I wouldn't say we're struggling with our letter but it certainly does take a lot of editing. The second session we were offered a rare treat to meet two couples who have gone through the rigors of the adoption process and came out the other side with a gleaming brand spanking new baby to show for it. They had extremely different stories in how they got their babies. One had been waiting for a year and a half and then got a call for an Immediate Hospital Placement. That means a birthmother decides to place the baby for adoption at the very last minute and has no chance to meet the adoptive parents during her pregnancy.

The other couple had a pretty normal domestic adoption experience. They waited 6 months, got matched, spent 2 months getting to know the birth mother, and then took the baby home. The only thing about their case that was out of the ordinary was that they are 2 men. And maybe that's not so out of the ordinary anymore...